Updates

A quick note - I've updated this blog and even changed the name to reflect where I am in life.  When I created the blog, it was for a specific purpose that, although not 100% fulfilled in the earth, has been soothed in my heart.  So now I embrace this new space, which is kind of an old space...

I was in a high school sorority and was given the nickname "No Surrenda" upon joining.  Even then, my sorority sisters noticed a tenacity in my personality that I barely recognized in myself.  I've loosely held on to the moniker via my screen names over the years as social media came of age as I did.

Additionally while in college I discovered that my name possibly means "from the river" in a central African language that migrated westward to be bestowed upon Queen Nzinga, my namesake.

Finally, I honor my Creator's constant provision in my life as tied into that meaning, using Jeremiah 17:8.

And so here we are.  2017.  No Surrenda.

Peaceful Beginnings

And so we have two daughters.

If you recall I'd decided home birth was in the cards for the latest addition, so let me update you on how it ended up happening.

I'd been having Braxton-Hicks contractions since early to mid November.  At first I was kinda scared about it because they seemed to start "early" in my pregnancy and after my previous losses, and specifically the anniversary of our sons' loss approaching, I knew that although we were past the point of viability I couldn't mentally handle a preemie.  But after researching it, I found that it was a normal thing to start that early, so I just relaxed and allowed my body to do what it needed to do.

But on Wednesday, December 14, some stronger contractions started that morning so I stayed home from work to monitor them.  Faith got a free day with mommy because I was so into monitoring them and wavering between knowing they'd lead to more and not that I simply didn't take her to school.  However, they stopped around lunch time so I assumed I'd be back at work Thursday and even called my boss to tell him so. Faith and I went out to get some food, came home and enjoyed the rest of our day.  But as I was getting into the bed that night my water broke. 

Alright, well I guess I'm having a baby tonight!  I roused the ribDonor from his sleep and asked for towel assistance.  Then I texted my midwife that I was going to lay down and wait for some action before heading to the birth center as the contractions didn't immediately start.  (After the financial stuff that I mentioned was straightened out with my insurance, I'd ended up deciding to birth at the center instead of at home.)  So I laid in the bed and chatted with my friends online...

An hour later contractions finally started, coming about 7 minutes apart.  I got up and went to the bathroom to labor more and to time them.  I was still chatting with my friends and they reminded me to finish packing my bag to be ready to head to the center.  As I was grabbing those last few items the contractions jumped from 7 to 4 minute spacing.  So I headed back to the bathroom and then very shortly labor slammed into high gear with 1 minute spacing right when I was about to ask hubby to drive us in!  So much for the new plan, back to the old one.  HA! 

After a short while with those serious contractions, remembering to use the open vowel sounds to vocalize my discomfort, I got in our tub and very soon started pushing.  It was around this time that I doubted my decision not to go to the hospital to get the meds, but then I remembered reading that this point of desperation meant that baby was super close, so I told myself to focus on the task of allowing my body to open and my baby to exit.  Not long after that I could feel her head and hair and thankfully I'd remembered to grab the waterproof case for my phone and was able to get a picture of her head as it was emerging!  That's the most memorable part of labor for me because my body stopped laboring and contracting for about 5 minutes at that moment.  I was stuck like an overturned turtle as I was trying to maneuver in our relatively small tub with this still huge belly and no useful legs because my range of motion was limited by this kid's head!  LOL  Thankfully, that also gave me a brief time to rest after such a quick labor and I was able to push her out as soon as the contractions resumed and she was born shortly after midnight on Thursday, December 15 (3 years, one week, and one day after her sister).

Water breaking to delivery: 3 hours.  No exams, no assistance, just me and baby girl.

So how does this story fit the title of this post?  Well, after all this, I texted the midwife and she came to check on us.  Then later that morning, as I sent Faith off to school, she paused, looked at her baby sister, and said, "she's so peaceful."  I was floored that she knew that word and so rightfully used it.  Later, as we were contemplating what to name her, I related that story to the ribDonor and it spurred us to arrive at her name: Serena.

Why Elizabeth again?  Well... Faith's name was given to us by God shortly after we got engaged and before we were married.  In the discussion about Serena's middle name, we re-researched the meaning of Elizabeth and upon seeing that it meant "my God is an oath" decided that it was also fitting for our second daughter.  And so here we are.  I finally got my home birth, and we have two sweet girls.